Can Divorce be Collaborative?

When couples get married, they begin with a commitment to live a life together, as partners and confidants. They work together to run a household, maybe raise a family and check off a few “bucket list” items along the way. Sometimes, for a variety of reasons, life companions arrive at a mutual decision to divorce. They are amicable. They share respect. Would a collaborative divorce benefit them?

Southeast Florida residents can legally divorce through a Collaborative Divorce. To collaborate simply means to work together or cooperate. So a Collaborative Divorce involves each spouse, along with their respective lawyers, working out the details without going into litigation. This brings couples to resolution in less time and with more pennies in their pockets than with traditional methods. Every time a divorcing couple steps into the court room, the time and fees, not to mention stress, increase.

What makes a Divorce Collaborative?

  1. Both spouses agree to negotiate issues in a non-adversarial way, working constructively and fairly.
  2. They commit to stay out of the courts.
  3. They willingly disclose information that is needed for the case.
  4. Lawyers manage the process.
  5. Neutral professionals, such as psychologists and/or financial advisors, may be brought in to assist.

If this sounds like a possibility or you would like to find out more about Collaborative Divorce? Check out this informative site: International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (IACP).

 


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The Angry Kid: Parental Alienation & Divorce

 Divorce attorneys from Jupiter to West Palm Beach agree that children can be victims of parental alienation. In April 2011, a victim of parental alienation spoke out and claimed that he had lied about being abused over ten years ago. Sometimes children of divorce are susceptible to brainwashing and creating their own little scenarios of how terrible the target parent is. The alienated parent may lie to their child about the target parent, so they can destroy the relationship between the other parent and child. More than ten years ago, Melinda Bronson was accused of sexually abusing her son. Her son recently spoke out and publically apologized for his behavior as a child. He stated that he lied in court because his father and stepmother “coerced and almost forced” him to say false statements. If he did not “satisfy them, [he] would have to pay the consequences.” What Bronson’s child did not realize was the impact of his accusations on his mother’s life— how could Bronson ever teach again with the title of a registered sex offender? It’s too late to compensate for the many years missed raising her children and the years Bronson was expelled from teaching, but it is not too late for us to realize that our actions can affect our children. It is important to keep children safe during a divorce and out of the middle of marital conflicts. For more information on parental alienation and destructive behavior, see this article.


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Parental Alienation Syndrome: A Real Divorce Disease?

       Divorce attorneys from Jupiter to Wellington have learned that the American Psychiatric Association is considering the recognition of Parental Alienation Syndrome as a disease in the 2013 edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Though the draft version of the DSM does not yet contain a definition for Parental Alienation Syndrome, the APA has specified that a group of mental health professionals has proposed a document discussing how to incorporate the term in the DSM-5.

        Parental Alienation Syndrome is defined as a theory that explains a child’s estrangement from one parent during a high conflict divorce. Without valid justification, the child allies himself or herself strongly with one parent, and rejects the relationship with the other parent. Individuals who want to see Parental Alienation Syndrome defined in the DSM believe that the term should be recognized as a legitimate mental health disorder because it has the potential to lend credibility to parental alienation in the divorce process. Opponents of PAS as a syndrome or disorder believe that the term lacks empirical research and should not be recognized in the DSM-5. For further reading on parental alienation syndrome as a DSM mental diagnosis, click this link


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Divorce: À La Carte

With the downturn of the economy, many individuals can no longer afford legal services for their divorce. In order to save money, an increasing number of people are shifting from professional legal aid to “do it yourself” methods. Experienced divorce attorneys from Jupiter to West Palm Beach are beginning to use reduced cost options called unbundled legal services. This modern development in the legal field is comparable to the method that one would use to order other services: à la carte. This innovative method consists of an agreement between a lawyer and client, in which the lawyer and client agree that the lawyer will undertake certain aspects of a case for a prorated fee.

  1. Using unbundled legal services for a divorce can benefit prospective clients in the following ways:
  2. Financially: The use of unbundling legal services for a divorce is advantageous to the client, as it is a less expensive alternative to traditional representation. Using this method, a divorce attorney is able provide legal advice without the exorbitant cost associated with a full-fledged representation.
  3. Expeditiously: Unbundled legal services can help a client to complete their case more efficiently and effectively due to the legal assistance provided by the divorce attorney. This service is valuable to the client, and it can help to ensure that they did not make any errors while completing paperwork.
  4. Promoting Freedom: Individuals who use unbundled legal representation methods can acquire a sense of independence, as they can undertake more responsibility than people who use traditional legal representation. When a client assumes more responsibility, they have the power to make superior legal decisions. 

Individuals from Palm Beach Gardens and Wellington should be informed of all types of legal services when looking to hire a divorce attorney, or embark on their pro se divorce case. For further information on unbundling legal services, please click here.


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The Ex Factor: Divorced Couples Vacationing

Many divorced couples in Jupiter, West Palm Beach, and Wellington are taking vacations with their ex’s and children. Divorce can be a difficult time for children, and some divorced parents believe that taking vacations together can help children create pleasant childhood memories. Cost- conscious individuals in the Palm Beach County area are fascinated with the concept of joint vacationing, and believe that these vacations have substantial benefits. Actor Bruce Willis has taken vacations with ex-wife, Demi Moore, their children, and her current husband, Ashton Kutcher. In an interview with Willis, he stated that Kutcher is his “extended family,” and he is thrilled that Ashton is such a great guy.

Some of the following explanations are reasons why divorced couples decide to take joint vacations together:

  1. Financial benefits: With the economic downturn, many individuals are trying to save money. Joint vacations have financial benefits, as couples can split the cost of the vacation, including food, accommodations, travel expenses and entertainment.
  2. Childhood Memories: Both parents are able to experience their child’s “firsts” while on vacation. Children can create positive childhood memories, as they are able to spend the same amount of time with both parents. 
  3. Less Stress: Divorced parents who go on joint vacations can both supervise their children. This option of joint custody can enable parents to stress less about their children, and enjoy their vacation.

Divorced couples from Palm Beach Gardens and Stuart should be informed of all options when planning a vacation. For more information on divorced couples vacationing together, please click the following link.


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We Can Get Married; But Can We Get Divorced?

Divorce attorneys in Palm Beach Gardens, Wellington and Jupiter are surprised to hear that a same-sex divorce was granted in Wyoming earlier this week.  Same-sex divorces can challenge the legal system, especially in states like Florida that do not recognize same-sex marriages.  Paula Christiansen and Victoria Lee Christiansen were legally married in Canada in 2008.  In 2010, a lower court in Wyoming dismissed the divorce petition due to a lack of jurisdiction.  In 2011, the state of Wyoming’s Supreme Court unanimously reversed the district court ruling permitting the same-sex couple to obtain a divorce.  Nevertheless, the Supreme Court made it clear that the court’s decision addressed only the issue of divorce, and that the state of Wyoming would confront the issue of same-sex marriage another day.  The court relied on a state statute, which declared that “marriage contracts which are valid by the laws of the country in which contracted are valid in this state” (Billings Gazette).  Furthermore, individuals in the LGBT communities believe that same-sex divorces are a step in the right direction.  For additional information on this court case, click the following link


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When Love Flies out the Window: The Mid-life Divorce

Lack of love and sex are the primary factors for individuals, enduring a mid-life crisis, to get divorced. Usually when we think of the term "mid-life" crisis, we think of a period of time when people change jobs, purchase fancy sports cars, or engage in risky behaviors. Why now, are people in their middle years getting divorced?

The following explanations provide reasons as to why middle-aged individuals across Jupiter, Wellington and West Palm Beach are getting divorced:

Lack of sex: According to statistics, many individuals aged 50 and older are getting divorced because their spouses are emotionally cold and no longer committed to the marriage.

Financial burdens: With the downturn of the economy, many individuals find themselves with large balances owed to credit card and mortgage companies. People suffering from large amounts of debt may find it easier to walk away from their families, rather than trying to pay off their debt.

Saga Divorce: Many people who have children have postponed their divorces for up to five years to keep their families together. With their grown children out of the nest, they can get divorced without feeling a sense of guilt for separating the family.

Second Divorce: Individuals in their second marriage are more likely to leave an unsatisfying marriage because they are emotionally traumatized from their first marriage. People in their second marriage are more likely to believe that they will endure painful experiences if they continue to stay married to their spouse.

Wanting different things out of life: During the middle years, some people conclude that they have not achieved what they want in life. They believe that divorcing their spouse will allow them to accomplish their goals in life.

Experienced divorce attorneys from Palm Beach County are seeing more middle aged divorces for the reasons listed above. Individuals in this age bracket should realize they are not alone. For more information on middle aged divorces, please click the following link.


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Passport to Divorce: Now That We’re Divorced, What Do We Do with the Kid’s Passports?

Divorce attorneys in Jupiter, West Palm Beach and Wellington are often confronted with the issue of what to do with children’s passports after a divorce. There are many issues to consider when obtaining a child’s passport after a divorce. Some parents are concerned about the other parent taking the child out of the country without prior notice or permission. Gary Maisel, an experienced family attorney in Fort Lauderdale, has developed a solution to the passport problem. After presiding over many mediations and issues regarding which parent should keep their child’s passport, Mr. Maisel started a neutrally-controlled company to hold passports for divorced parents. Mr. Maisel’s company, Passport Depository and Escrow Corp., requires both parents to sign an extensive agreement with specific terms. The terms require a written authorization form certified by court order or signed by both parties. The release of any passports must be apparent and only pursuant to an original written, notarized letter of authorization executed by both parties with properly notarized signatures or by certified court order. Mr. Maisel’s service can help protect children by ensuring that their passports are kept in a secure and safe location and, at the same time, reduce the anxiety and concerns of their divorced parents. For more information, contact Passport Depository & Escrow Corp. at (954) 760-9848.


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What’s Your Divorce Risk?

Divorce attorneys in West Palm Beach and Jupiter are able to spot some reasons why couples are getting divorced. An article published in The Daily Beast provides the top 15 reasons for couples to get a divorce. The article also provides the likelihood and percentages of why individuals get divorced.
Some of the following signs were listed in the article and provide reasons for the high divorce rates in the United States:
1. Age. Statistics show that if a woman got married before the age of 18, their marriage faces a 48 percent likelihood of divorce within 10 years.
2. Children. If one spouse wants a child more than the other, their marriage is more than twice as likely to end in divorce than the marriages of couples who agree on how much they do or don’t want children.
3. Sex of children. Data reveals that if you have sons, you face a 36.9 percent likelihood of divorce, whereas if you have daughters, the likelihood rises to 43.1 percent.
4. Men with high testosterone. A man with high testosterone levels is 43 percent more likely to get divorced than a man with low testosterone levels.
5. Children with ADHD. If your child is diagnosed with ADHD, you are 22.7 percent more likely to get divorced before the child turns 8 than parents that don’t have a child with ADHD.
6. Cohabiting with a lover other than your spouse. If you are currently married, but have lived with a lover other than your spouse, you are more than twice as likely to get divorced than someone who has never lived with a lover.
7. Not smiling for photographs at a young age. If you didn’t smile for photographs early in your life, your marriage is five times more likely to end in divorce. Optimistic people find it easier to get along with others, and smiles are revealed at a young age.


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Divorce and Parenting: Privacy, Please!

Divorce attorneys from West Palm Beach, Wellington, and Jupiter understand that young children are using social networking sites to communicate with others. Several social networking sites attract pre-teens, sometimes as young as 5 or 6. These sites don’t allow the same types of communication that adults have, but parents should still be wary of these websites and help their children socialize safely online.

Even though websites such as Facebook have age limits, and no one under the age of 13 is technically permitted to have a page, 30 percent of parents admitted to allowing their tweens to log on. Parents should talk to their kids about social networking sites and help them realize the consequences of sharing information with strangers. Some of the following suggestions offer ways that divorced parents can protect their kids on the internet:

  1. Teach children to keep personal information private: No matter what kids think, nothing is really private. It is up to kids to protect themselves by thinking twice before they click the "post" button. Moreover, it is important for parents to help kids define what information should be withheld from the public.
  2. Use privacy settings: Using privacy settings to restrict access and postings to your child’s webpage can limit who can view their online profile and can control the online functions they may use.
  3. Talk to your kids about bullying: Bullying can take many different forms—from spreading nasty rumors online and posting or forwarding private messages without the sender’s consent. Tell your children that the words they use online could have real-world consequences.
  4. Make sure kids know to respect other people’s privacy: It is important to respect the privacy of others because we live in a world where everyone is connected. If kids spread a rumor, they can’t assume that what they post will stay private. Whatever they say can and most likely will, come back to haunt them.

For more information for divorced couples on tips for monitoring kids’ social networking pages for please visit:

http://www.parenting.com/article/kids-social-networking


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