January 30, 2020


mature woman with outstretched arms in nature

It is the beginning of a new year.  For each new year comes our best intentions in the form of New Year's resolutions.  Among those resolutions are the ones that deal with self-care and self-help.

            This is a busy, hurly-burly world where parents have increasing demands and pressures placed upon them.  Those pressures increase when you are going through a divorce.  The Verywell Family magazine recently provided a number of ways in which parents may reinvigorate and refresh themselves.  They include:

  1. Spend time in nature. Studies clearly indicate that spending time in nature can be good for us emotionally, psychologically and physically.  A quick walk in the park, in the neighborhood, or on a nature trail or even time spent tending flowers on your front lawn or in your back patio could help you feel more relaxed and refreshed;
  2. Listen to music.  It does not matter what form of music you enjoy, listening to music can be a great way to take care of yourself.  The beauty of music is that you do not need to set aside a special time to be alone to enjoy it.  Turn it on while you are feeding your children or caring for them.  Alternatively, you can listen to your favorite songs while you are getting up and getting ready for the day;
  3. Set aside time to be alone.  Busy parents have few opportunities for solitude.  Sometimes it seems the only time we are alone is when we are in the restroom.  However, it is important to provide yourself a few minutes of alone time each day other than bathroom breaks.  Even if it is only 5 minutes that you set aside to relax alone, a little solitude can help you unwind.  You can always find a few moments, even if you are waiting for your children to take a nap or after they leave for school; and
  4. Schedule time with friends and family.  Studies have shown that maintaining social connections is an important part of the feeling of well-being and a necessary part of appropriate self-care.  However, as a parent, it can be difficult to find time to spend with friends or family, particularly if the activities do not involve your children.  Nevertheless, it is important to schedule future social activities.  Doing so provides you something to look forward to (which is a great self-care strategy by itself).  The actual engagement in a social activity will give another boost to your psychological well-being.  Whether you are playing golf with a neighborhood friend, having lunch with some neighbors, getting your nails done with your friends, participate in activities that help you stay connected with other adults.

            Self-care is very important to maintain our psychological calmness and our physical health.  To learn more about additional suggestions for such activities, please visit the Verywell Family  by clicking here.


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