Palm Beach County Family Law Blog

Sunday is Mother’s Day. Divorce attorneys long have recognized that parents play a fundamental role in the development of their children’s lives, both for the better and for the worse. Because of divorces, blended families have become common in American society. However, on Mother’s Day we often forget stepmothers. Stepmothers should be recognized for their very important role they play in children’s lives. Stereotypically, stepmothers are maligned in our literature. Who has not heard of the term:“Wicked Stepmother”. Women, who marry previously divorced men, often find themselves trying to establish the appropriate role as new spouse, parental figure, and participant in a blended family. It is sometimes difficult to be everything for everyone. Nevertheless, the majority of stepmothers are able to perform this role. So let’s not forget stepmothers on Mother’s Day.

A good book for learning more about these issues is Blending Families, A Guide for Parent, Stepparent, Grandparent, and Everyone Building a Successful New Family by Elaine Fantle Schimberg.

Divorce attorneys and mental health professionals long have acknowledged that emotional cheating by one spouse can cause the breakup of a marriage just as easily as sexual cheating. Emotional cheating can easily occur on internet chat rooms by a spouse with a “roving eye”. Communication in the context of relative anonymity of the internet can quickly become heated and can lead to clandestine romantic meetings. At least that is the expectation of the participants. Such a meeting recently led to a couple commencing a divorce action when they discovered that they had been secretly chatting with each other in highly romantic and provocative language in a chat room. Ironically, the couple poured their hearts out to each other over their marriage troubles and both thought that they had found their soul mate. The inevitable meeting in person occurred and it did not have a happy ending. The couple have filed for a divorce with each accusing the other of being unfaithful.

In the 1070s the singer/songwriter, Rupert Holmes, released a song, entitled: “Escape”. It is better known as the Pina Colada song. Everyone remembers the line from the song: “Do you like Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain.” The song dealt with a “committed”couple who each began corresponding with other potential romantic interests. Neither knew what the other was doing. A meeting was arranged where the couple discovered that they had been corresponding with each other and not another romantic interest. The couple, described in the song, had a far happier ending than did the couple who “found” each other on the internet. At the time of the song’s release, listeners never thought that the situation described in the song could occur in reality. Flash forward a few decades and reality (in a more technological sophisticated setting) imitated art.

The moral of the story is like most advice about the internet. Things on the internet often are different than they seem. Anything that you do on the internet may come back to haunt you later. If you should not be doing something in your life, then you should not do it on the internet.

If you want to learn more about our “internet soul mates”, you can click on this link

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Custody claims in highly contested divorces revolve around who is the better parent. Involved, knowledgeable, and caring parenting is the “Holy Grail” of such quest. Children and their computer use is a subject of review, vigilance, and concern for parents, involved or not involved in a divorce. Internet blogs and other social-networking sites recently have exploded in popularity and in the news. The number of MySpace.com users currently is estimated at more than 66 million. The majority of activity on these and other youth-oriented web sites is positive or can be positive. However, we have all read stories how people, who would harm children, use these sites to lure children and teens into inappropriate discussion. Such sites can also be used as a source of cyber bullying. For parents to combat these dangers, www.netsmartz.org offers a wide range of Internet safety resources for parents and children. Parents can start by taking the “Blogs Beware” quiz. For kids, there’s a related site: www.netsmartzkids.org. For teenagers, there is www.netsmartzteens.org. This teen site specifically deals with how to identify and deal with cyber bullying.

Whether you are an experienced divorce lawyer or a well-seasoned family law attorney, or just a parent who’s willing to educate yourself, these sites may be of value to you, your friends, or your client.

To learn more about our firm and practice, please visit us online at www.cjamiesonlaw.com

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Most couples celebrate their wedding, experience a wonderful wedding reception, and leave for their honeymoon in happiness. However, the Ross Township, Pa dentist and his bride had a completely different experience. The wedding and the initial stages of the reception proceeded without any problems, except that large quantities of alcohol were consumed. The real “festivities” began outside of the couple’s seventh floor room at a local hotel. A heated argument developed between the newlyweds, which appeared to be culminated by the groom giving his bride a karate kick that knocked her to the ground.

Two good Samaritans from another wedding party rushed over to restrain the husband from further exerting his unique form of connubial bliss upon his bride. The bride immediately attacked her two would be rescuers. The fight swirled down the hall and into the elevator. The elevator opened onto the first floor lobby. The husband and wife rushed out, grabbed two heavy metal planters in the hallway and hurled them at the would be rescuers, who were still in the elevator, slightly injuring them.

The police arrived and immediately arrested the married couple, charged them with a number of criminal violations, and escorted them off to jail. The next morning, the newlyweds made bail and left the jail separately. The wife, still dressed in her now “off white” and somewhat damaged wedding gown. The groom left with a bloody tee-shirt, tuxedo pants, and one shoe. They will next see each other at their respective criminal arraignments in May.

I have experienced acrimonious, highly contentious divorces. However, I have not seen any highly contentious weddings like this. You do not have to be a seasoned divorce attorney to know that this marriage is in trouble. If ever a situation cried out for a prenuptial agreement, this is it. I wonder just how many of their friends at the reception were family law attorneys and how many of those family law practitioners are hoping they will not be contacted by either the groom or the bride. If this how this couple fights at one of the allegedly happiest times of their lives, then imagine how contested their divorce will be. Please use this link to learn more about this story. Be sure that you also access the videos located on the same page as the news report.

To learn more about our firm and practice, please visit us online at www.cjamiesonlaw.com

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At the end of a divorce case, the former spouses often think that the worse is over. Unfortunately, experienced divorce attorneys know that the expectations often are not the same as the encountered reality. Family lawyers know and inform their clients that the credit for one or both spouses can be negatively impacted during and after a divorce. Credit cards, car payments, mortgages and other vehicles for obtaining credit can be affected during the divorce. During a divorce, it is critical that the basic or minimum payments be made on credit cards and other forms of credit that the couple may possess. The Federal Trade Commission has published some basic strategies and guidelines for individuals and their credit. Click here to read the FTC publication.

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We all dream of being successful. In pursuit of that dream, we study hard, we obtain higher educational degrees and we work long hours to learn the ins and outs of our jobs and to hone our skills. We believe that success will make the rest of the issues in life easier to handle. Seasoned divorce attorneys come to understand that for many of their clients this drive for success may be a contributing factor to a client’s separation or divorce.

Surprisingly, the pursuit for success may be a cause for a divorce, if one of the parties is a successful business woman. A recent New York Timesarticle, reported that this is the conclusion of a study, conducted by Professor Robin Fretwell Wilson of the Washington and Lee School of Law. Her study found that women with M.B.A.s described themselves as separated and divorced more often than other women with college degrees and more often than men with law or medical degrees. We can speculate as to reasons why this dynamic effects this portion of the female population more often than others. To review Professor Wilson’s analysis, please explore the link to the relevant New York Times article.

To learn more about our firm and practice, please visit us online at www.cjamiesonlaw.com

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Divorce attorneys generally represent good people at their worse. Consequently, family law attorneys are constantly urging their clients to appear, act and speak in a centered, temperate fashion. It is not always easy for husbands and wives to follow this wise advice. Sometimes, while embroiled in highly contested issues such as contested child custody, alimony and division of marital assets and liabilities, people speak before they think.

Such an example is actress and playwright Tricia Walsh-Smith. She complained loudly about her divorce case, ranted about her prenuptial agreement and bashed her husband and held him out in a highly negative light. However, these actions were not enough for Ms. Walsh-Smith; she then made and posted a video of her harangue on YouTube. This is not a wise move for anyone in any divorce. It is sure to irritate the judge and provide her husband’s attorney with information to use against her in her pending divorce case. In addition, it is likely to subject her to international ridicule. Many “internet warriors” have already posted “rebuttal” videos on YouTube that parody, ridicule and condemn her actions. Her video posting on YouTube may come back to haunt Ms. Walsh-Smith in way sthat she did not suspect.

If you are in a divorce, then do not post any video or message on the internet for public consumption. Please click here to watch the video and form your own judgment.

To learn more about our firm and practice, please visit us online at www.cjamiesonlaw.com

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Pets often play an important role in our lives. Whether you are childless or have a houseful of children, pets form part of the mix that gives meaning and joy to our lives. We have close bounds and often strong emotional attachments to them. We love them dearly and grieve when they pass on. Not surprisingly, divorce attorneys often are confronted with clients adamantly demanding that the family law attorney obtain custody or visitation with a pet. Some individuals are willing to devote the same energy and resources to obtain such goals, just as if they were engaged in a highly contested child custody or contested child visitation battle. Unfortunately, Florida family law attorneys and divorce attorneys in other states are often powerless to obtain their clients’ goals or desires on this issue. Florida and many other states treat pets as property to be divided, instead of like children with whom relationships must be protected and maintained. Nevertheless, creative attorneys may be able to create arguments and strategies to obtain possession of a greatly beloved animal member of the family. Attorney Mark Wortman of Kansas, in the attached blog entry, has some thoughts on this same issue that you may find enjoyable and creative. Click here to read it.

To learn more about our firm and practice, please visit us online at www.cjamiesonlaw.com

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This article points out why cohabitating unmarried couples should consider a cohabitating agreement.

Click here to read the article.

To learn more about our firm and practice, please visit us online at www.cjamiesonlaw.com

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Divorce cases are emotionally draining and can be extremely provoking for both spouses and for their family law attorneys. On numerous occasions, many  divorce attorneys have bit his or her lip, figuratively or literally, to keep from making an inappropriate statement or comment. Most times they are successful. In addition, many divorce attorneys and their clients may have felt that they were in the Twilight Zone in terms of dealing with unreasonable positions taken by the other party, the amount of stress with which they were dealing  and the nature of the highly contentious attitudes in the case. I know that in many highly contested child custody cases and during other highly contested issues I have felt the same. Most people know how to express these feelings appropriately and privately. Unfortunately, at least one attorney has found that humming the theme song from the television show: “The Twilight Zone” while referring to the opposing party (the wife) during a highly contentious meeting is not ethically appropriate and can be sanctioned by the bar association. For a more detailed description of what happened during the meeting and what happened to the attorney, please visit the attached link to LAW.COM. This case is a warning to divorce attorneys, directly, and to the parties, indirectly, in divorce cases to act appropriately, even during the most heated exchanges.