Palm Beach County Divorce And Family Law Blog

Questions to Ask Yourself Before Hiring Your Divorce Attorney

Posted on May 15, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

People in Palm Beach County know that hiring a divorce attorney is important. Attorney Howard Goldstein in the Massachusetts divorce blog recently discussed questions that people should ask themselves before hiring a divorce lawyer. These questions include:

1. Have you chosen carefully and slowly? Not all lawyers are alike. There is much gray area in family law. Different lawyers have different approaches to similar problems. You should definitely interview more than one lawyer and get a feel of how they approach your situation. Trust your instincts. If you don’t feel comfortable, pay attention to your gut and keep looking;

2. Does your lawyer have people skills and are you comfortable with him/her? A client’s experience going through a divorce has a lot to do with how they are treated and how they relate and communicate with their lawyer. You should look for an attorney who’s easy to talk to and who listens to you. You are going to spend a lot of time with this person as you go forward. You should work with a lawyer who does not hide behind legal terminology. Do you understand everything your prospective attorney is telling you? Does the attorney speak in plain English? Does he or she stop periodically to check to determine if you understand what is being discussed? Does your attorney express appropriate concern about how you and the children are doing? These are all signs that the lawyer may be the right one for you to work with;

3. Will your lawyer encourage you to assist with your case in an effort to keep the costs down? Organized, thoughtful clients can save a lot of money by preparing their own budgets, histories, list of questions for discovery, organizing financial documents, and in other ways. A lawyer who may be a good fit with you should be willing to consider as much involvement as you can successfully and comfortably handle in an effort to reduce your expenses.

4. Does the lawyer offer other alternatives for your divorce, such as mediation, collaborative law, or are they traditional in their approach, only believing in litigation? You may come to your divorce lawyer with only one approach in mind; it is important to make sure that you consider all alternatives available for your divorce. When you go to a physician, you want to make sure that you learn of all possible forms of treatment. The same should be with your attorney. If your attorney never goes to court or if your attorney only wants to litigate, then that lawyer may not be appropriate for you.

5. Is my lawyer open to consultations with experts? There is a great unpredictability of divorce. Judges have wide discretion in a large number of areas in a divorce case. It is important for you to have as much input from as many professionals as you can afford in your case. Good divorce lawyers routinely obtain consultations or opinions from accountants, appraisers and other real estate professionals, financial planners, psychologists and other mental health professionals, and other professionals related to the court issues in your case. If your lawyer appears to be a know-it-all and reluctant to bring in other professionals to assist you in obtaining the best possible result in your case, then that attorney may not be the one for you.

Whether you live in Jupiter or in Wellington, the selection of a divorce attorney may be one of the most important decisions you make in your life. Answering the above questions should assist you in finding the right attorney for you, your children, and your case. To read more about Attorney Goldstein’s questions, click here.

Divorce Charlie Jamieson, divorce lawyer, Marriage

The Graying of Divorce

Posted on May 8, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

Although the divorce rate in the US has declined slightly in recent years, one segment of the population has doubled its rate in the past 20 years: the 50+ year old category. Research sociologists Susan Brown and I-Fen Lin of Bowling Green State University will present their findings when they share their paper, "The Gray Divorce Revolution," at Ohio State University in April.

“In 1990, only one in 10 people who got divorced was 50 or older; by 2009, the number was roughly one in four. More than 600,000 people ages 50 and older got divorced in 2009.” Wall Steet Journal online

So what seems to be the issue? The generation experiencing this trend, the Baby Boomers, have different ideas for the core meaning of marriage. Brown shares this thought, "In the 1970s, there was, for the first time, a focus on marriage needing to make individuals happy, rather than on how well each individual fulfilled their marital roles." This shift has caused discontent among many couples who are facing empty nests for the first time in many years. They begin pondering life in terms of having an ending and looking at their dreams: fulfilled or unfulfilled.

One common element of those divorcing later in life seems to be a previous marriage. “Fifty-three percent of the people over 50 now getting divorced have done so at least once before. . . Having been married previously doubles the risk of divorce for those ages 50 to 64; for those ages 65 and up, the risk factor quadruples,” says Brown. In addition, simply having less experience at being married may increase the chances for divorce. “Nearly one half of those who divorced in 2009 had been married fewer than 20 years; of those who stayed together, nearly three in five had been married for more than 30 years.” Family law attorneys from Jupiter to Wellington would agree that divorces in Palm Beach County are also reflecting this national trend.

Divorce

Tuna Casserole Again? I Want a Divorce

Posted on May 1, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

Experienced divorce attorneys from Jupiter to West Palm Beach know that serving tuna casserole is not a sufficient ground for divorce in the State of Florida. Florida is a No-Fault state. However, some states in the United States and some English-speaking countries still require a finding of fault in order for a divorce to be granted. In England, one of the grounds for fault to justify a divorce is "unreasonable behavior". In a recent New York Times article, British divorce lawyer Vanessa Platt listed some of the grounds that her clients have alleged constituting unreasonable behavior to justify a divorce. Unbelievably, they include:

1. My husband insists I dress in a Klingon costume and speak to him in Klingon;

2. My wife has maliciously and repeatedly served me my least favorite dish, tuna casserole;

3. My husband has not spoken to me for 15 years, communicating only by Post-it Notes;

4. My husband has atrocious body odor;

5. My husband keeps his pet tarantula, Timmy, in a glass case next to the matrimonial bed, even though I had requested that Timmy sleep elsewhere;

6. My husband repeatedly takes charge of the remote television controller, endlessly flicking through channels and fails to stop at any channel that I request;

7. My wife spitefully tampers with the TV antenna and throws away my cold cuts.

People in Palm Beach County can shake their heads in wonderment and disbelief that such allegations could constitute justifiable grounds for a divorce. It makes Florida's grounds of "irreconcilable differences" seem almost civilized. To learn more about false-based divorce London style, check out the New York Times article here.

Divorce Charlie Jamieson, Contested Divorce, irreconcilable differences, No-Fault

How Pets Are Treated in Florida Divorces

Posted on April 24, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

We become quite attached to our pets over time. We bond with them. We play with them. We feed and nurture them. They provide solace during our times of crises and emotional turmoil. They become one of the family. We grieve them when they die. In divorce cases, experienced divorce attorneys from Jupiter to West Palm Beach recognize that pets are important part to families. Unfortunately, the courts in Florida treat pets not as a member of the family but rather as a form of property.

Here are some basic issues to remember in a Florida divorce involving pets:

1. No matter how fervently you feel that your pet is a member of the family, Florida courts consider animals to be property only;

2. As property, equitable distribution rules apply to your pet. Therefore, your pet is subject to be awarded to either you or your spouse. The only exceptions are if you can prove that your pet is your separate property. Generally, you can only prove that your pet is your separate property if:

a. You owned your pet prior to being married (proven through bills of sale, vet bills dated prior to the marriage, etc.);

b. Your pet was given specifically to you as a gift during the marriage by someone other than your spouse (which may be somewhat difficult to prove); and

c. Your pet has been either willed or bequeathed to you (such as a long-lived parrot willed to you by your uncle);

3. If you have a valuable pet such as a horse, purebred, or show animal, it will be considered to be a valuable asset and may be treated accordingly.

If you and your spouse do not agree as to the ownership of the valuable pet, the judge could order that the animal be sold and the proceeds divided according to what the judge thinks is appropriate.

Although in Florida your pet is legally considered to be property, you may wish to consult with an experienced attorney to develop tactics to either negotiate or litigate the ownership of your pet. For instance, if you have minor children (human) who have formed a close attachment with the pet, consider letting the pet go to the parent who has majority timeshare of the children. To view other strategies, please visit my You Tube video on this issue at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zv0CRJTDZUA.

The litigation of pets is a very emotional issue in court. Because of our close bonding with our pets, make sure that you don't shortchange yourself. Inform your attorney early in the case and prepare your positions in negotiation and litigation on this issue.

Division of Assets & Liabilities, Divorce Charlie Jamieson, divorce, marital property, pets, property, valuable asset

Seven Benefits of Collaborative Divorce Versus Traditional Divorce

Posted on April 17, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

People from Jupiter to Wellington are searching for other alternatives to a traditional divorce. There are many reasons to use the collaborative divorce process if your spouse is willing and your family is a good fit for the process. The following advantages describe some of the benefits of the collaborative divorce:

1. The process is generally less costly than litigation. A collaborative divorce does not use competing experts and the parties are not wasting their financial assets by constantly litigating in court;

2. The process is generally less time-consuming. The collaborative case can frequently be completed within four to six meetings versus six months to two years that a contested case may take to be resolved in Palm Beach County;

3. An atmosphere of cooperation reduces the psychological/emotional stress that accompanies traditional divorces. The parties set out a contract which contains a set of governing rules as to how the spouses, attorneys, and other professionals and participants interact during a collaborative divorce. This process minimizes the abrasive conduct that may be present in many traditional cases;

4. Each party has the assistance of an attorney. In many divorces today, not all parties have the assistance of an attorney to guide them through the process;

5. Each party is a vital part of the settlement team. Both spouses are treated as critical components of the team which focuses on settlement. The spouses, the attorneys and the professionals are not adversaries. All participants are seeking a resolution that meets the needs of the family;

6. The team can focus on settlement without the imminent threat of “going to court”. The parties and their attorneys sign a participation agreement that states that the spouse and their lawyers will not take their divorce to court. This contractual clause eliminates tactical bargaining based on threats of litigation; and

7. The spouses control the outcome. Rather than a judge deciding a family’s parenting and financial futures, the parties themselves negotiate with the assistance of the other participants in the process a Marital Settlement Agreement. The decision-making power stays with the husband and the wife.

The collaborative process focuses on interest-based bargaining. In a collaborative divorce case, the participants focus on the underlying concerns, needs, and interests of the parties. The traditional litigation model usually involves position-based bargaining, where each side commits to a position early in the litigation and only thinks of their own position and attaining their own goals, and attaining their own wants and needs, regardless of the impact on their spouse or their children. Whether you live in West Palm Beach or elsewhere in Palm Beach County, you should consider a collaborative resolution of your divorce or other legal dispute.

Collaborative Divorce, Divorce Charlie Jamieson, collaborative divorce, divorce, family law

Divorcing Later in Life: Is It Healthier for You?

Posted on April 13, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

Divorce is stressful. We can all agree with that. Sociological studies are proving it and demonstrating how it can affect a person’s health.

In a study published in 2009, Linda Waite, of University of Chicago and co-author Mary Elizabeth Hughes, of Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, discovered that “divorced or widowed people have 20 percent more chronic health conditions such as heart disease, diabetes or cancer than married people.”

The researchers compiled data from four categories—chronic conditions, mobility, depressive symptoms and their self-assessment—studying 8,652 middle-aged people. The results were clear. Health suffers when an couple divorces gets divorced. Waite says, “What's interesting is if people have done this and remarried, we still see, in their health, the scars or marks — the damage that was done by this event.”

In a more recently published study by Michigan State University sociologist, Hui Liu, reported that when older adults divorce, the event causes less health problems than with younger couples. Liu analyzed reports from over 1,200 participants in a 15-year national study, “Americans’ Changing Lives.”

Of people surveyed who were born in the 1950’s, the highest number of health issues was reported by those who divorced in the last half of their thirties. Their complaints outnumbered those who divorced in their late 40’s and those who stayed married during the study.

Interestingly, those who remained divorced or who remained married during the study, reported about the same health issues. Liu surmised that “it is not the status of being married or divorced, per se, that affects health, but instead is the process of a divorce transition . . . that it is stressful and hurts health.”

To find out more about either of these studies, click here or here.

Divorce, Marriage Charlie Jamieson, divorce, Marriage, stress

Start Over Smart, Divorce Expo

Posted on April 10, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

Last weekend, in New York City, the first US Divorce Expo opened to rave reviews. The creators of the “Start Over Smart” event are a mother-daughter team who had been touched by divorce and were working on a book to help divorcees. According to the Start Over Smart website, the event “provides a central gathering place for women and men navigating the divorce process as they seek information, services, and expert guidance from trusted professionals.” Francine Baras and Nicole Baras Feuer saw a need to put divorce professionals under one roof. “It was a lot like a bridal expo — only with less cake and more lawyers.” (source)

The idea for the Expo came straight from Paris. As the two worked on a book to assist divorcees in the complicated issues of divorce, they heard about a divorce expo that was hosted in Paris. They reasoned that putting on this expo in the US would help with the research for their book but more importantly it would help others who really needed it.

Nearly 40 exhibitors came together such as lawyers, therapists, financial advisors, life coaches, stylists and more. One of the many interesting vendors included Maria Coder, InvestiDate founder, who spends time teaching investigating tactics to singles.

Besides perusing the vendor booths, attendants were able to attend seminars and panels on such topics as legal issues, planning for the future and even dating. Presenter Amy Laurent, a high-end matchmaker and founder of Amy Laurent International, hosted a party to bring soon-to-be-singles together in a fun and low-stress environment.

Baras said, “We provide all the resources, information and support you need for going through your divorce and creating your post-divorce family, your post-divorce life.”

The event was such a success that the pair hopes to take it on the road, bringing the expo to people and in other cities and allowing them to benefit from having resources available in one place.

Divorce, Marriage Amy Laurent International, InvestiDate, Start Over Smart, US Divorce Expo

How to Save More Money in a Collaborative Divorce

Posted on April 3, 2012 by admin | Permalink 2

Separating the marital assets of a couple is often complicated and costly. Working towards that goal through a collaborative divorce may feel daunting but with the help of an attorney, it can reduce costs over traditional litigation. Want to cut costs even further? Take the advice of Richard Price, a collaborative law attorney from Texas.

By following any of these recommendations, you will cut down the amount of time needed from your attorney, thereby reducing your fees.

1) Organize your financials: Palm Beach County requirements for financial disclosure in a divorce originate from the state law. The documents needed include tax returns, bank and credit card statements, and personal property lists and may include more complicated items such as brokerage statements or property and estate documents. Be sure to present the copies in a timely and organized fashion when requested by your lawyer.

2) Have an agenda when meeting with your attorney: Make the most of every minute with your attorney by being prepared. Be ready with a list of issues that have occurred since your previous meeting and questions that you would like answered.

3) E-mail first and keep it on-point: Communicating by telephone adds time to communications. Social standards for civil behavior require that pleasantries be exchanged before business can be discussed, wasting valuable time. An e-mail allows you to get to the point quickly and keep your issues brief. Take some time to edit your communication to just the essentials before hitting send. There’s no need for fluff here.

4) Combine your questions: Instead of calling or e-mailing your attorney every time you think of a question or comment, communicate less frequently but with more content each time. Keeping a small notebook in your briefcase can help. When questions occur to you, write them down and then combine several into one time-saving e-mail.

Keep in mind, each of these items deals with clear and concise communication. Whether you reside in West Palm Beach or Wellington or elsewhere in Palm Beach County, practicing the skills will help your lawyer be more effective with your time. Saving you money.

Collaborative Divorce, Divorce Charlie Jamieson, collaborative divorce, divorce, Marriage

Mistakes to Avoid in Your Divorce

Posted on March 27, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

Whether you are representing yourself (as a pro se litigant) or you are represented by an experienced divorce attorney, people involved in family law cases often experience emotional turmoil, frustration, aggravation, and anger. Because they have little or no experience with the legal system, they often are overwhelmed by seemingly complicated and thorny legal questions. Loriann Hoff Oberlin in her book Surviving Separation and Divorce, outlines some of the basic legal errors or mistakes that individuals make in their divorce cases. They include:

1. Believing your spouse will be fair and cooperative. During a divorce, people are experiencing an extreme emotional loss and, consequently, are emotionally vulnerable and upset. Oftentimes, they are in a state of denial about their circumstances and about their spouse. All too often, experienced divorce lawyers from Jupiter to Wellington hear: "My spouse never would treat me this way"; however, much to their discomfort, dismay and chagrin, spouses do mistreat their soon-to-be ex's. Consequently, when you are involved in a divorce case, you should look out for "Number 1″ and expect your spouse to do the same. Once you are involved in a divorce case or a family law case, you're part of an adversarial system. Ms. Oberlin advises that all participants in a divorce should adopt an attitude of cautious pessimism, lower expectations and to expect the worse and then be surprised if it turns out better;

2. Having totally unrealistic expectation/demands of what you want from the divorce. In almost every divorce case, everyone wants to win on every issue. Oftentimes because they are angry and upset, people's demands and expectations are exaggerated. People in divorce cases face a wide assortment of seemingly overwhelming issues including, but not limited to: finances, children, dividing family businesses, retirement accounts and other issues in dispute. People have to concentrate on prioritizing their goals and setting realistic expectations. Focus on problem solving and do everything you can on your own case;

3. Not asking appropriate questions or signing documents without asking questions. Many people are intimidated by the divorce case, the courts, judges and the adversarial system in general. Consequently, they often feel intimidated by their lawyers and their spouses and, instead of asking questions, accept everything on blind faith. Oberlin advises you should ask questions about every document in your case as if you were buying a new car. In addition, you should ask to review all documents including pleadings and marital settlement agreements before they leave your attorney's office. Attorneys, like other people, make mistakes. Once something is entered in the record or a judge's memory, it may be too late to correct it.

4. Withholding information from your attorney. Some people don't trust their lawyers. Some people are overly concerned about maintaining control over the chaotic circumstances of the divorce case. Some people try to look good. Some people are trying to fool their attorneys and the court system. However, by doing so, most of them lose control, fool themselves and injure their cases. Oberlin's advice is: "If you want your attorney to do an effective job, you have to give your attorney complete and accurate information. If you fail to do so, your attorney, based on your incomplete information, may implement a strategy that is actually more harmful to you rather than helpful to you. In addition, if you're withholding damaging information, it inevitably will be revealed at the time most damaging to your case";

5. Expecting the legal system to be fair and that the court will see things from your perspective. No matter how much you think you are right; no matter how much you think that justice is on your side; and no matter how much you think that anyone can see the case from your perspective, the judge often can see issues from another viewpoint and may not agree with you. In addition, because of the statutes, procedural rules and evidentiary rules, judges must often rule on limited and not total information. Consequently, don't expect that your view of the case, no matter how noble and just, will be the one that wins. The court will not always rule in your favor. The better you can become at problem solving, then the more likely you will be to obtain a positive outcome;

6. Allowing emotions rather than logic to rule your decision making. Many people going through a divorce are emotionally distraught, upset, angry, and are experiencing an extreme loss from the demise of their relationship. Unfortunately, decisions and actions based on emotions rather than tactical, strategic or logical thinking, most likely will backfire and injure your case. Oberlin advises that: "People should become reflective rather than reactive." Make sure that you think carefully about what you say or do during any divorce case. When in doubt confer with your attorney; and

7. Forgetting tax ramifications of legal decisions and not hiring a financial advisor. Divorce proceedings will involve the division of assets, properties, estates, retirement monies and, sometimes, the receipt of spousal support. All of these actions in a divorce case may have tax implications for you. Oberlin advises that you have a trusted financial advisor counsel you on the tax consequences of your decisions if you settle a case or the rulings a judge may make in the event that you have to litigate your divorce case. Don't always depend upon your attorney to know the tax consequences of the results of your settlement agreement or divorce judgment.

Oberlin's book provides useful information for individuals who are contemplating or involved in a divorce case. However, if you do not have the opportunity to read Ms. Oberlin's book then you should consult and follow the advice of your West Palm Beach, Board Certified, experienced family law attorney. However, if you wish to learn more about Ms. Oberlin's book, click here.

Divorce Charlie Jamieson, divorce, finances, money, separation

Defining the Various Ways to be Divorced

Posted on March 20, 2012 by admin | Permalink 0

Divorce is challenging, not just emotionally but legally. The laws and practices for divorce vary by state and make it nearly impossible for lay people to comprehend what is involved. Add to that a very emotional time with an uncommon vocabulary used primarily during legal cases and the process becomes overwhelming and intimidating.

Divorcing individuals should begin by understanding common types of divorce.

In Uncontested Divorce, a divorcing couple makes agreements and presents them in writing to the courts for approval. This is most commonly used in relatively short where the parties are able to reach agreement.

Default Divorce may occur when one spouse fails to file a response to a written divorce petition. It can also be filed if the person cannot locate his or her spouse.

Collaborative Divorce remains one of the gentlest ways to become legally divorced. Parties, in partnership with their attorneys, resolve conflicts respectfully and are committed to doing so without court intervention. Since Collaborative Practice employs specially-trained attorneys, the process can proceed smoothly and everyone can feel secure that all the legal issues are resolved. Find out more about Collaborative Divorce here.

Contested Divorce remains complicated and challenging. The couple cannot agree how to handle finances, child related issues and support and other important decisions. Each partner hires a lawyer and the issues are litigated in the courts.

Arbitration is a legally binding procedure in which a third party “go-between” reviews the cases of divorcing spouses and makes judgments in accordance with laws and rules governing divorce. The arbitrator renders a binding agreement that spouses must uphold sometimes without possible appeal. Read more about arbitration here and here.

Mediation is a voluntary process in which divorcing couples work with a neutral third-party to create a workable separation agreement. Being voluntary, if one spouse chooses to quit, the other has no recourse and mediation is terminated.

Divorce Decree (Decree of Dissolution, Judgment of Divorce) is the court’s final judgment regarding contact schedules and time sharing of your children, property distribution, child custody and support, and other financial issues. The date of the decree is the legal divorce date. One is able to remarry after this is completed.

No matter which type of Divorce seems to make sense for your situation, find a qualified attorney who will help sort out the jumble of laws, actions and judgments involved in divorce.

To read more definitions involved in divorce, click here.

Divorce Arbitration, Charlie Jamieson, collaborative divorce, Contested Divorce, Default Divorce, Divorce Decree, Mediation, Uncontested Divorce